💛 SELGrade 2Lesson 18
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Think Before Reacting

Lesson preview: the Mini Lesson and Vocabulary are open to everyone. Guided practice, exercises, the parent checklist and the printable PDF worksheet come with full access (free 7-day trial or membership).

What you will learn

  • 1Put the four steps of Think, Pause, Decide, Act in the correct order
  • 2Explain why pausing before reacting leads to better outcomes
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Mini Lesson

Has anyone ever said something that made you SO angry that you wanted to shout right back? That fast, automatic urge to act is called an impulse. Learning to pause before you act on an impulse is one of the most powerful skills you can build.

Reacting vs. responding

  • Reacting is fast and automatic — you act before you think.
  • Responding is thoughtful — you pause, think, and then choose.
  • Reactions often make things worse. Responses usually make things better.

The 4 steps: Think, Pause, Decide, Act

  • Think — notice what you are feeling and what just happened.
  • Pause — take a breath, count to five, or step away for a moment.
  • Decide — ask yourself: "What is the best choice I can make right now?"
  • Act — carry out your thoughtful, chosen response.

Pause strategies

  • Take three slow, deep breaths.
  • Count slowly to five before speaking.
  • Walk away for a moment and come back when you feel calmer.
  • Squeeze your hands tightly, then let go and relax.

Words to know

Impulse

A fast, automatic urge to act

e.g. An impulse made me want to shout back.

React

To act quickly without thinking

e.g. Reacting often makes things worse.

Respond

To answer thoughtfully after pausing

e.g. I respond by taking a breath first.

Pause

A short stop before you act

e.g. A five-second pause helps me cool down.

Decide

To choose carefully

e.g. I decide what to do next after I pause.

Think Pause Decide Act four step chainFour connected boxes in a horizontal chain showing the steps Think, Pause, Decide, and Act with arrows between them, with a reacting vs responding comparison below.Think - Pause - Decide - ActThinknoticePausebreatheDecidechooseActrespondReactingFast and automaticAct before thinkingOften makes it worseRespondingPause, then chooseThink before actingUsually makes it better
The four-step chain and a comparison of impulsive reacting versus thoughtful responding.
Four pause strategiesFour illustrated pause strategy cards: take three deep breaths, count to five, walk away for a moment, and squeeze then relax your hands.Pause StrategiesTake 3 slowdeep breaths5Count slowlyto fiveWalk away fora momentSqueeze hands,then release
Four pause strategies — deep breaths, count to five, walk away, and squeeze then release.
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Ask yourself: "Am I about to react or respond? What would happen if I paused for just five seconds before acting?"

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← Lesson 17: Recognize Right vs. Wrong ChoicesLesson 19: Be Responsible Online →